12.29.2010

This much I know, it wasn't boring

I just looked at the calendar and noticed that on Saturday, it will be a whole new year, wow, that was fast! I have to say that all in all, I think it was a good year for us. It wasn't easy and certainly wasn't boring. It started off a little rough. I was in a terrible amount of pain from injuries I had gotten in an accident the previous March. After having a really great trial with the Eco we had to send it back and again, Claire had no voice, which she found very frustrating. Chloe was just starting to really do all of the things that Claire had once mastered and then lost which felt a lot like having my heart constantly ripped out and stomped on. However it was through that craziness that I got back to a place where I started to feel again and I can not say how wonderful that has been. I think I had been pretty close to a zombie, trapped on a hamster wheel of survival for a solid 2 maybe 3 years and this was the year that I got off. February was really the month that changed the pace. First I had surgery on my wrist which really helped once I recovered. Since I wasn't much use with one hand I got to sit and have my tattoo finished, which was such a good way to really feel, I am still surprised at just how therapeutic that process was. Then we had Erika's Dream which was a lot of fun. There is something so rejuvenating about being around our Rett family, they just give life. Then Make A Wish sent Claire and our family down to Disneyland to meet Ariel. That was a game changer, really, Make A Wish is awesome. The way that trip encouraged and inspired Claire was transformational, it gave her the confidence that she carries today. I think it was around the end of March that the Eco came, that was also a huge part of this year. I can't imagine life without her voice, even when it is annoying and she says the same thing 30 million times in a row, I love it! I would have never imagined that Claire would be teaching her sister how to say silly things, but with the Eco that has happened. Chloe has grown by leaps and bounds by the minute the whole year through. She is such a sweet and caring little girl. I have loved getting to know her spirit and seeing what is possible when all the DNA gets in the right order, it is amazing! Before Chloe I honestly didn't get why people would want to have so many kids (more than 2) but now I can say that it makes a lot more sense. No, that is in no way an announcement, we are very content with 2 little girls, if I were to guess, the next thing we add to the family would be a male service dog. Back to the story, this summer I had my first and most likely last trip to Las Vegas. I got to spend time with some of the greatest moms that grace this planet today and with no kids! Erica dubbed it the rettaway and I am hoping that something of that nature lines up again for 2011 because it was epic. I think that one of the defining things of the last year has been the deep friendships that I have made within the rett world. Even though many of them are not really close, just knowing that there are others out there has given me great peace and I love you guys so much! If there were a metaphor for this last year I would compare it to a scab. The injury wasn't super fresh, but it hurt. As it heeled and peeled off it was a different kind of fresh hurt, but I could start to use it more. After this year of having the scab picked off and regrow and eventually heal, there is still a little scar tissue, but I am functional. I am excited for 2011. If there is anything that the last year taught me it was that I don't dream big enough. So with that, I suppose that I can't even start to think about the fun and exciting things that will take place in the next year, but I know that it is out there, and I am ready for it! I am hoping that among the fun stuff for next year is a trip to Boston in May and since I am working on the whole dreaming big thing, I am going to through out that I hope they announce the cure while I am there, that would be really, really cool! Final thought, I have decided that Sigh No More by Mumford & Sons was my theme song to 2010, so here are the lyrics for you.

Serve God love me and mend
This is not the end
Lived unbruised we are friends
And I'm sorry
I'm sorry

Sigh no more, no more
One foot in sea, one on shore
My heart was never pure
And you know me
And you know me

And man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing
Oh man is a giddy thing

Love it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you,
It will set you free
Be more like the man you were made to be.
There is a design,
An alignment to cry,
Of my heart to see,
The beauty of love as it was made to be (x4)

2 comments:

Dawn said...

Lots of love to you and hoping for a boring 2011!

Erica said...

big hugs. im so thankful to be a part of your life, even if it's because of stupid rett syndrome.
love you!